


Peridot in the rain

by NighttimePhilosopher



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Amethyst cheers her up, Confession, F/F, First Kiss, Peridot gets angsty about homeworld, its raining!!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-26
Updated: 2016-10-26
Packaged: 2018-08-27 03:28:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,904
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8385409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NighttimePhilosopher/pseuds/NighttimePhilosopher
Summary: "It rained often on Earth. It was sudden and sometimes startling, for Peridot. It was a lot like her feelings for a certain purple gem"





	

**Author's Note:**

> It finally rained heavily after a long time. It inspired this. Enjoy. (Listen to rain sounds w/ headphones on for best effect!)

It always started with a cool change in the air, Peridot noted.

Then the grey “clouds” (as Steven called them) would roll in over the ocean. They would make the air cold as they swirled and got bigger and more powerful. Then they would release their contents of pure water below them, the water pelting anything and everything. It was called “rain”, and it rained often on Earth. It was sudden and sometimes startling, for Peridot.

It was a lot like feelings, she noted. Joy, sadness, happiness, anger, love. Feelings were foreign to her, like she was to this planet. Homeworld – where feelings and expression of them were banned – was her home. And feelings only really hit her on this planet too, quite like how she had only felt rain for the first time upon Earth’s surface. It was strange, but appealing that she could compare the two.

“Sometimes, there a rain clouds that seem to appear very big, but then they dissolve into nothing, because there truly was no force behind them. Then there are rain clouds that build and build, and that are held for some time, before they let it all out, because they’re going to burst if they don’t.” Steven had told her. Peridot listened and absorbed the information, taking it to heart. She asked if “Dad” had told him this, since he was a natural and native life form from this planet, and because he had also explained “thunderstorms” to his son.

“No” Steven answered “Garnet told me that. She said that you can replace “clouds” with-“

“Clods?”

“No, haha!” he held a hand to his face. That was funny. He wasn’t sure if Peridot was trying to make a joke, or if she was generally lost.

Peridot smiled, knowing her unprecedented usage of the word “Clod” had caused him to laugh. Researching the psychology of “jokes” had made her an extremely funny and cool person to be around. But she wasn’t the funniest OR the coolest person to be around in the gem temple. That was Amethyst. The thought of the purple quartz made the green olivine’s fake heart beat faster.

 _Oh my stars, she’s so cool_ Peridot thought, lost in her own little world. Her silky white hair, her vibrant purple gem, and oh, her raspy laugh that was music to Peridot’s ears. Amethyst was THE coolest gem.  She made weird, intense feelings buzz within Peridot. They were uncomfortable and upsetting, but she didn’t exactly want them to go away.

Steven made ship crashing noises, and waved his hand in front of her face “Kssh, Earth to Peridot, come in Peridot, kssh” he called, pretending he held a radio in his hand, attempting to make contact with the gem, who seemed to be in space. Peridot zoned back into the conversation seamlessly, except not really because the coolest gem ever had just entered the room. Her eyes darted to Amethyst, who looked like she had come out of her room after a nap.

“Wow, you really zoned out for a second. But, anyway, don’t you wanna know what Garnet said?” Steven resumed, unaware of Peridot’s distractedness.

“U-um no, no t-that’s okay Steven, I’ll be fine” she stuttered, awkwardly patting his shoulder in an attempt to thank him. “O-okay” Steven said, disappointed. She walked passed him and bee-lined straight for Amethyst. Even if she felt flustered sometimes, she was compelled to be around her.

The purple gem noticed her “oh, hey Peridot, good morning” she greeted, but then walked over and checked the window for any kind of sunlight outside. “It is morning, right? I can’t tell ‘cause the sun isn’t out and I don’t keep track of time in there, hehe” she admitted with a laugh.

“I, uh, heh, yeah” Peridot stuttered in response. She watched Amethyst brush hair out of her face.

“uhh, so is it morning or not, P-dot?” Amethyst asked, staring at Peridot for an answer. “You should know, you’ve been out here. I sorta wanna know how much time I wasted, hah” She grinned. This flustered Peridot even more.

The green gem looked to the window, where light grey clouds covered the sky. They were gathering and growing bigger. The wind picked up too, flinging things around and pushing trees. It was like how she was feeling. It was wild and she couldn’t control it, and before it felt nice, but now she needed to talk and she couldn’t, and it angered her. Yesterday, she could talk to Amethyst fine. They had a conversation about birds. But today it was too much. She put a hand over where her heart would be if she was human. Then she looked at Amethyst again.

“It’s, umm, midday” she said, in the hopes of finally answering her. Peridot knew the numerical system and times very well, but today she didn’t keep track of the exact hour.

“It’s 12:54” said Steven from behind, filling Amethyst in. He walked over to the two.

“Yis, not too late!” Amethyst fist-pumped.

‘What’s up with you, Peridot? Today you’ve been really distant” Steven said, hugging her from behind. He wrapped his arms around her and nuzzled his head into her back. Peridot flinched from the contact and wanted to pull away. Steven felt the gem’s reluctance and let go. “Sorry..” he mumbled.

“Dude, remember she doesn’t like to be touched!” Amethyst growled to Steven.

“But, I just wanted her to feel better!” Steven argued “I’ve hugged her before when she felt sad!”

She tried to appear normal, and hide the storm on the inside. “H-Hey, I’m okay. M-Maybe it’s the weather?” she shrugged, using a human expression to try to fit in and sound fine. But to the others, that was weird for Peridot to do.

“You sure?” Amethyst asked, her purple eyes searching Peridot’s green ones. She was leaning closer, which wasn’t helping Peridot. Her eyes widened and a blush dusted her face. “That’s not a “Peri” thing to say” Amethyst used her fingers as quotation marks. Amethyst picked up a lot on Peridot’s normal behaviour, and something was up.

Peridot went from 0 to 100 in a matter of seconds “M-M-My vocabulary and i-it’s usage are NONE of your concern! Effectively, I say what I want!” she shouted defensively. Amethyst looked ready to laugh “Especially now that my diamond hates me!!” she cried, accidently spurting out more emotions and feelings that she wanted to hide. There was an awkward silence afterward.

“Ooh, so that’s what’s getting you” Amethyst said, crossing her arms and looking content that she had uncovered what she thought was the truth.

“Huh? No-“

“Aww, Peridot, you could have just told us!” Steven cried, looking like he wanted to hug her again.

“Steven!” Peridot said through clenched teeth.

“Do ya wanna cuddle that stripy orange teddy bear we got you? I won’t judge!” Amethyst asked, teasing Peridot as a way of comforting her. Peridot growled in response, facepalming. Her temperature was rising.

“Oh, it’s in the bathroom, right? I’ll go get it” Steven said, dashing for the bathroom. “I love its warm eyes” he remarked.

“N-No! Wait!! I don’t actually-!”

“Or maybe you just need a hug from me!!” Amethyst said, quickly approaching the green gem and grabbing her, lifting her into the air. She squeezed her in a bear hug, which warmed Peridot’s body up very quickly. _Too close, too close!!!_ She internally screamed.

_The coolest and most desirable Amethyst is so very unaware of my feelings, and is making my entire being an uncomfortable temperature!! It feels horrible, yet it’s the best, most exhilarating thing I’ve ever felt in my short life!! I-I must stop it! I really shouldn’t be feeling this at all, despite my urge to be around Amethyst….It, It isn’t RIGHT! R-right?_

“G-Get off!! Let GO!” Peridot screeched, weakly punching the purple gem in the arm to get her to let go. Amethyst quickly put her down. She looked shocked at the sudden outburst. The punch didn’t hurt, but, whoa. _Did I hug her too hard and hurt her? Is she okay? I hope I didn’t hurt her…_

“Peri-“

“I-It isn’t that!!” Peridot yelled “It isn’t that! It’s something-“ she jumped, knowing she couldn’t reveal anything about her weird feelings “-something else! It just, isn’t that!!” Her form bristled, and her fists were clenched. There was a hurt, raging feeling in her eyes. Steven popped his head out from the bathroom.

“oh. Do ya wanna talk about it?” Amethyst asked calmly in the face of her outburst. Amethyst wanted to help however she could. She cared about her deeply and didn’t enjoy seeing her mad – well, when it wasn’t cute, that is.

“NO!” Peridot turned and stormed away. That was exactly what she DIDN’T want to do. No one could know what Peridot was feeling. It was a secret, and she would die if anyone found out. Especially Amethyst. She had to get away before they found out.

She quickly headed to the door of the beach house. She opened it, went outside, and closed it. She leaned on the railing.

“I suppose I should listen to myself. I DID tell Steven not to hug her…” Amethyst sighed to herself, wondering what got the green gem so upset.

“I hope she’s okay” Steven said, coming out into the room “I’ll go talk to her” he started for the door.

“N-no dude, I got this” Amethyst stopped him, and headed for the door herself. She was about to be enveloped in a storm.

* * *

 

The wind blew Peridot’s triangular hair, making it lose its edge. She didn’t care as she focused on the unsettled ocean, which looked dark like the current sky. The clouds were a lot darker now, and on the horizon, it was raining. The weather was swirling together, ravaging the area. It was uncomfortable, but better than it was in the house, where she could become flustered at the sight of Amethyst, or be asked questions.

_That was close. They were really persistent and annoying, and Amethyst….she didn’t mean to, but she went a step too far. I can’t handle that amount of affection…._

She suddenly got mad at herself. “What is wrong with me, am I cracked!?” the green gem whispered to herself. The rain clouds came closer. Peridot felt the cold air envelop her. It was pleasant against her warm skin. It was relief, and Peridot was grateful. She took a deep breath to try to slow her ragged breathing. “Why am I so out of control?.....This is bad” she said, a little louder. She gripped the rails and her face screwed up. Her bottom lip quivered. “I’m pretty sure I know what this is. Why I’m defensive. Why I’m aggressive. Why I’m upset, happy, and crazy at the same time. Why I’m confused. This feeling that is tearing me apart. The reason Amethyst is so cool and impressive. It’s not just……respect” her breath hitched.

“It’s…..love”

She felt cool, wet droplets on her tense hand. She opened her eyes, unaware that she had closed them. On her green hand were watery splotches. She felt a heavy pressure on her eyes and cheeks, and removed her visor to find water dripping from her eyes. “What? Is this…?”

More wet joined her as the rain finally made it over to the beach house. The rain pelted down on her. It was heavy, unlike her first encounter with the substance. It was an outpouring of stored up rain and energy, too much for the grey clouds to contain. The water needed freedom. It needed an escape. Remaining cooped up for so long did no good. It was like feelings.

“Feelings of rage, of sadness, of….love…..They must be released, they must be shown. Otherwise, they hurt.” Peridot sniffed and let more water fall from her eyes, trickling down her visor and joining the liquid masses. She sobbed, the sound drowned out by the rain. “But….Homeworld!” she cried, more sobs racked her body. She cried into her arms against the balcony’s rails. “H-How can I ever show my love to Amethyst?!” She felt overtaken by her swirling emotions of guilt, self-hate, confusion and despair. Her hair’s triangular shape was gone, now in knotty, uneven blond locks that reached her shoulders. She looked like a different gem. A new, broken appearance, and unstable feelings to match.

“P-Peridot?” a quiet voice in the pouring rain, but Peridot knew it was her.

The green gem did not move. At first, she wanted to flee and never return. But her outburst and emotions had exhausted her. She decided she didn’t care if Amethyst saw her in this state. Why did it matter?

Peridot sniffed audibly in the rain “Peridot….are you…crying?” Amethyst asked hesitantly. The green gem half turned towards her, as if saying “Yeah, I am, why does it matter?”

The purple gem could make out tear streaks under Peridot’s visor. Amethyst moved closer to the rails. “Why are you crying?” she asked carefully. She sounded sad.

“Is….that what these are?” Peridot asked sullenly. “Tears…” she answered herself.

“P-Peridot-” Amethyst started, Peridot’s dark mood was scaring her.

“It’s like the clouds, Amethyst” Peridot said suddenly, a sob bubbling up. She looked up to the dark, cloudy sky, raindrops trailing down her visor. The other gem remained silent. She took in a deep breath.

“What Steven was saying…..what Garnet said….” She said, turning to Amethyst, an arm still on the rail, and tears running down her cheeks.

“Clouds? Garnet? Oh, yeah… I remember her saying something about them” Amethyst said, remembering faintly something Garnet had told them all a few months ago, before Peridot joined them. “What about them?” She was trying to understand Peridot, where she was coming from. _Why is she even talking about that? Did Steven tell her? Why is she so upset?_ The purple gem had several things running through her mind, trying to piece together what was making her dear friend so upset. It hurt her to see her crying. It was like she was punched in the stomach. It wasn’t something she was new to – she felt similar with seeing Pearl after the Sardonyx incident. But with Peridot, it felt worse for some reason. As soon as she heard her sniffle, Amethyst wanted to envelop her in a warm, protective hug. It was taking intense willpower not to do so, seeing how she reacted before to contact.

“They…..what Garnet said” she paused to sniff and take in more unneeded air “I figured it out. R-Replace the word occurrences o-of “clouds” with “feelings”….” Amethyst suddenly moved even closer.

Peridot looked to the ground, recounting what Steven told her “there are “clouds” that appear very big, but th-then turn out to be nothing…nng” Amethyst was almost touching her.

“T-Then there a-are “clouds” that build and build…and they are going to burst if they don’t reveal what they are feeling!!” Peridot yelled, suddenly reaching forward and grabbing fistfuls of Amethyst’s now soaked t-shirt. She didn’t dare look the other gem in the eye, rather staring at her white boots. What was going to happen? Did the purple gem understand what she meant? What had she done? Amethyst probably hated her now. She was going to get pushed away, she was going to-

Large, warm, comforting hands made their way around her body, encircling her and drawing her forward. She felt herself being pushed into Amethyst’s chest. “Wha?” Peridot lifted her head to see Amethyst’s gemstone, her core being. It was shining bright purple in the gloomy rain, and felt a little warm.  She was about to raise her head higher when a powerful electric feeling suddenly pulsed through her small frame. There was a pair of warm, full lips gently pressing onto her smooth, green gem. They belonged to Amethyst.

At that moment, the cold rain did not matter. It didn’t exist. Everything was mute. All she felt was warmth. She was numb. Too numb.

“A-Amethyst…” Peridot felt her legs failing her. She gripped more of Amethyst’s black shirt in an attempt to remain standing. Amethyst’s hold on her grew tighter. She blushed intensely and looked up at the beautiful (also drenched) gem who had kissed her.

“Heh, you’re too cute, Peri” Amethyst grinned, feeling extremely giddy and wearing a purple coloured blush. She watched the other gem stare up at her, no words able to come to mind. The blush on Peridot’s face grew as she realised they were making eye contact. She quickly looked down, seeing that she was still grabbing onto Amethyst’s top. She let go and pulled herself up, standing properly, albeit a little shaky. She took a moment before looking back at Amethyst’s face again.

“Y-You…..why d-did you do that?” the green gem said, clearly confused, although she was longing for more. She held onto Amethyst’s supportive arm with one hand and lightly touched her gem with the other, still feeling the lingering feeling of Amethyst’s kiss.

“I….I like you too” Amethyst said, averting her gaze to the side as she spoke the truth. “T-That’s what you meant, right? W-With the clouds and feelings stuff?” a concerned look overtook her happy face.

She blushed again “O-Of course I do! I just….” She trailed off, looking away. She gripped both of Amethyst’s arms. The rain made itself present again, drowning out any other noise. That happy feeling faded away.

“Just….what?” Amethyst asked, panic rising. What was it? Did Peridot not love her?! Was she second guessing herself?

Thoughts of home filled Peridot’s mind. The stars, the spaceships, the multitude of other gems, obeying the rules and carrying on with their distinct jobs. They all had a place, an order. They didn’t need to interact with other gems in the way she wanted to interact with Amethyst. To hold, to hug. To…..fuse? She compared their clean slates to her own. She was a traitor, a Crystal Gem, and she…..loved another gem. A faulty one. But that made her faulty too, in her diamond’s eyes. She could see the glaring yellow eyes, scrunching in disappointment and disgust. She could hear her diamond’s booming voice, ordering for her breakage.

_“Peridot, you are to be broken for this! Smashed into dust! Wiped from existence! And no less for the amethyst either!”_

The thought of Amethyst being crushed was even worse than imagining her own destruction. It was gut-wrenching, and made fear spread through her body. She began to shake and became unreasonable.

“A-Amethyst, I-I can’t!” She closed her eyes tightly, shaking her head. Her stream of tears started up again, and she tried to get out of Amethyst’s hold.

“Peri!” Amethyst tried to hold the suddenly frightened gem close to calm her. Peridot sobbed.

“It’s Homeworld, Amethyst!” Peridot cried, staring fearfully at Amethyst. “We’ll be broken!”

“But Peridot, we aren’t on Homeworld!” Amethyst tried to reason with her. Was this the thing she was upset about? Was this the thing making her hold back?

“They’ll come, she’ll come, and break us! We can’t!” she held onto Amethyst’s arms tightly, now only weakly trying to escape. She cried loudly in the still pouring rain, the two sounds mixing and combining in Amethyst’s ears.

Amethyst felt horrible. Peridot had been feeling this apprehension and fear for as long as she had feelings for her. She was from Homeworld, like Pearl and Garnet. But she didn’t have the millenniums to forget about Homeworld’s harshness, like they did. She only had over half a year on Earth. She still felt its pull on her, and she couldn’t forget what had been drilled into her her whole existence. She could imagine Peridot, sitting alone in the dark, wanting to reach out to her. And then, for that, she would be shattered. The thought made her want to cry and hold the gem tight. She wanted to protect her from her nightmares and torments. Amethyst didn’t have much of an understanding of Homeworld, but from what she knew, she hated it. Yellow Diamond wouldn’t get her hands on her Peridot, physically or mentally.

Amethyst put her hands on Peridot’s small shoulders, bracing herself against the shaking gem. The green gem was crying and speaking uncontrollably. Then she closed her eyes, leaning forward and capturing Peridot’s lips with her own, silencing her. The green gem whimpered into the kiss, as it instantaneously comforted her, which was Amethyst’s plan. But the green gem was tense, unsure what to do as she had never kissed before. Actually, Amethyst wasn’t much better, only really seeing others around her kiss. She went off of that knowledge and moved her lips against Peridot’s, slowly moving her hand up the green gems neck and through her wet hair to support her. Peridot eventually tilted her head to get more comfortable, but then she broke away.

“S-S-Sorry” she sniffed “I d-don’t know h-how to….” She trailed off, pointing to her lips. “I-It’s a-amazing, b-but-mmph!” Amethyst bought her forward and kissed her again, pushing against her. Peridot decided, through a dazed mind, to copy the actions Amethyst made with her lips. She kissed back properly, causing Amethyst to quietly moan in appreciation. She felt the vibration of the sound on her mouth and face, and it empowered her knowing she caused that sound from Amethyst. Slowly but surely, she pressed against Amethyst more and more, returning the kiss and making small, cute sounds of her own.

After an unclear amount of time, Amethyst broke the kiss. They both looked very dazed and flustered, but happy.

“I was…..I was explaining something, right?” Peridot asked randomly, stuck staring into Amethyst’s purple eyes.

“Hmm? I d-don’t know….I was j-just r-really wanting to kiss you” Amethyst admitted. “Y-You’re so cute, and you looked so confused, I just h-had to. Y-You were so upset…” the gem trailed off, lazily watching the water drip off Peridot’s visor onto her small, button nose. She was still incredibly flustered by her actions, and found it hard to talk.

“Oh, uh, thanks, heh” Peridot smiled. She was embarrassed at the way Amethyst described her. She felt the same about the other gem, though. She found her very appealing and cute. And cool. Exactly why she couldn’t lose her. She looked sad again. Amethyst noticed.

“You’re on Earth now, with me” She hugged her close “Those rules don’t apply to you here. You’re safe” she knew what was troubling her loved one.

“O-Okay” Peridot whispered “I’ll try to remember” She promised herself to not be afraid, for hers and Amethyst’s sake, for their love. She meekly leaned up and kissed Amethyst on the nose, which made her smile. They both giggled, still being showered by the rain clouds.

“Before, I felt like I was going to retreat into my gem!” Peridot admitted, now having no problems at all. There were no tears, and she looked like her vigour was returning. “It was a lot, but it was good. Really good” Amethyst bumped her forehead onto Peridot’s visor.

Then the purple gem felt the other gem shiver in her grasp, and she remembered they were in the rain. She suddenly shivered herself “H-Hey Peri, let’s go inside. It’s warmer there”

“Hm, yes, good idea”

They walked inside, hand in hand, out of the cold rain. The rain was intense and powerful, but both gems got through it, together.

**Author's Note:**

> Holy shit you guys that was the gayest thing I’ve ever written. I need a breather omg. My little heart….lol anyway thanks for reading! It was so so good to write this ahahha. Have a another thing too.
> 
> Bonus: Amethyst held onto Peridot calmly. Then, hesitantly, she placed a kiss on Peridot’s gem.  
> “W-What? What was that for?!” Peridot suddenly jumped away from Amethyst. The purple gem was confused.  
> “I thought you liked me?” she said. “That’s why you were upset?”  
> “N-No! Ew! I was crying because I like Pearl, not you!” Peridot screeched, pointing at Amethyst, who looked like her heart was breaking. Peridot stormed inside, out of the rain, leaving Amethyst to sulk.
> 
> (For a weirdo friend on Fanfiction.net that ships Pearlidot XD I know you will read this!! jk Peri doesn’t have the hots for my waifu. Amedot forever!!) (also, not hating on pearlidot plz no flamez)


End file.
